The Next Pandemic

Posted May 22nd, 2007 by

I’m making a prediction here.

Forget Avian Flu: the next pandemic will be the first wave of brain-eating zombies. I’m serious here, this is a viable threat. Otherwise, would all those movies steer us wrong?

It’s changed my thinking on pandemic contingency planning, we now are planning on building an armory next to the NOC so that we can have continuity of operations. In addition, part of our annual security training for NOC and SOC staff will involve the find points of being sure to shoot zombies in the head.

In fact, there is a phenomenal simulation of a zombie outbreak. Try changing some of the factors, there is a key on the right side of the page. Note that there is no option to kill the zombies, so well-armed survivalists are not accounted for in the simulation. Real-world infestations might be different if this happens in Idaho versus downtown DC (where firearms are outlawed).

Lessons to remember for the upcoming zombie pandemic:

  • It’s hard to make an outbreak extend past one block if the population density is low. New York beware!
  • Alleys are the conduit for the spread of infestations.
  • Green zombies are easier to spot than white zombies.
  • When the zombie pandemic starts, we all get zombified.


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Posted in Zombies | 11 Comments »

11 Responses

  1.  LonerVamp Says:

    Considering we live in a global economy, I think it should be part of any pandemic business continuity planning to make sure you have consumers for your business. This means making sure the rest of the world survives intact enough to give you business.

  2.  rybolov Says:

    I don’t think you can ensure that you will have customers, but probably the first step is to start thinking about if you will have enough customers to sustain your business during a pandemic.

  3.  LonerVamp Says:

    Hrmm…maybe the business DR site should be located into the mountains or a remote island. Or one could diversify products enough to not only serve the living, but also those zombies.

  4.  Saso Says:

    Well, as the clip on Bring The Love Back site – http://bringtheloveback.com shows, consumers today already got too smart for their own good and don’t fall prey to advertising techniques of yesteryear. So if there is no economically viable zombie population yet (and many would disagree on that – remember, zombies mostly follow the directions of their masters and generally don’t think themselves) I bet you all the Belgian beer of your choice you can drink in Sydney, Australia (you pay your own ticket) that there will be a significant population soon.

    The marketing departments of this world need it! It is either that or come up with effective marketing campaigns, and we all know how hard that is. Just remember, marketing departments face the same uphill battle InfoSec departments do when they try to sell the idea of security to the top business management.

    The difference between marketing and InfoSec: if you’re in InfoSec, you’re 90% likely to be a guy, talk in a lingo that only your professional peers understand, don’t pay much attention to style and think there can never be enough content in your message. If you’re in marketing, you’re 90% likely to be a blond babe, talk in a lingo that only your professional peers understand, don’t pay much attention to the content of your message and think that your message would be accepted if only you could put a nice red ribbon on it.

    So, I think you’re right on the money – the next pandemic is going to be zombies. And we better figure out what their need for InfoSec is going to be. From the simulation on the site you posted, they will be the market to target. Given enough time, they can be made to repeat after you: “Risk Management is good. COSO is good. AS/NZS 4360:2004 is better.” 🙂 Well, maybe not the last one, that might be stretching their mental abilities a bit.

  5.  rybolov Says:

    Marketing for the post-zombie world:
    http://wiki.urbandead.com/index.php/Mczeds

  6.  rybolov Says:

    So I take it there is interest in the upcoming zombie pandemic and zombies in general? When I first started this category I had my doubts as to my sanity http://www.guerilla-ciso.com/archives/110 but some friends encouraged me by saying it was kooky but fun.

  7.  halon73 Says:

    Last year I sat in on a panel that discussed how to survive a zombie attack. I think in the beginning of the zombie attack it would be easy to survive as there would only be a few zombies and they are slow so running away wouldn’t be a problem.

    But when one of the zombies on the panel asked why zombies just don’t eat each others brains the zombie said “we don’t like to talk about that” and moved on.

    Strictly from a pop culture view I think that it is a popular topic because zombies are a way we can talk about death and the loss of control at the same time. Two things humans I think fear the most. In my view choice is just an illusion of simple minds who have yet to dare conceive that the universe, like a machine, is operating on a set of instructions. I hope that someday we can gain the knowledge and wisdom to understand those instructions. But we are but a grain of sand on the beach of the Cosmos.

  8.  halon73 Says:

    Yeah I went off the deep end. But I got to tell you ever since I started taking medication all these thoughts and ideas just keep popping in my head!!!!

    It’s like someone turned on the light switch and the walls of the room were covered in writing and papers with entirely expressed constructs composed on them. So one for g@ds sake give me a task so I can channel this!

  9.  wolfie Says:

    um …rybo don’t be dissing the “alleys” especially the dark ones, i get my best customers there. Before too long, due to my increasing consumer base, who all feel the love, will too, walk in the light of Zombification. Its a given. My alleyfying the humans is dependent on how much their eyeballs glow in the dark. See you there bucko

  10.  Saso Says:

    Well, zombies are making it big: http://news.com.com/8301-10784_3-9723086-7.html

    Shame, really. Smart money is still on werewolves and vampires. 😉

  11.  The Guerilla CISO » Blog Archive » Zombie Flash Mob Says:

    […] Comments Saso on The Next Pandemichalon73 on Interview Questionswolfie on The Next […]

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